Hi, everycat. Jezebel here.
I know what you're thinking with that title. Really? Kittens? Those disgusting little cutie pies that make the humans go "awwwww" and start talking like they've hit their heads. "Who's da cutie pie kittencakes? You are, yes you are." Really, it can be a little disgusting. Especially to an almost 21 year old cat.
But before you older cats go dismissing kittens entirely, they do have a few benefits. Maybe not enough to have to put up with one, but if your human slaves insist on bringing you home a new brother or sister, I want to make sure you know how to take advantage of the situation.
First of all, kittens want to eat A LOT, which means that the slaves will be feeding cats more often. Take advantage of it! Make sure that you get some of that extra food too. Don't let the kitten reap all the rewards. Also, kittens will eat up your leftovers so you'll never have to eat dried out old food. Or be expected to do so by the slaves.
And the human slaves really like use baby talk on the kittens. Which means, hopefully, they'll be using it less on you. Hopefully there will be a little less of that "sweetie," "fluffy," and other disgusting nicknames since they'll be using those on the kitten. At least one can hope.
And my favorite thing, about kittens is that they're warm. Us older cats can get cold, especially in the winter. A kitten who insists on cuddling you can be used as a space heater.
So if your human slaves force you to put up with all that nauseau-inducing kitten cuteness, make sure you take advantage of the situation.