Monday, December 31, 2018

Mew Year's Eve


Happy Mew Year's Eve y'all! I has been thinking - a lot of da peeps make resolushuns dis time of year. Well, I don't need resolushuns since I are purrfect. But my momma on da udder paw, she could use some help. So I are providin her wif some good resolushuns.

1. Bacon is a once-a-week MINIMUM treat. No eggscuses!   
2. More chikken livers for ME.
3. Less lookin at kittens online. Yeah, dey are "cute." But I are all da cat ya need. And if ya want more cat, you can feed me more.
4. Speakin of feeding me more, let's add in Third Breakfast.
5. And Second Lunch.
6. Nip - it are legalized everywhere, so I demands da chronic. 
7. More play time - dat means wand toys, throwin nip mousies, knockin jingle balls around for me.
8. More bandanas. I's a fashion forward kitty and I has a reputayshun to maintain.
9. Start appresheatin my vocalizayshuns more. Ya's lucky ya has a man(cat) willin to talk to you.
10. Stop calling yourself a crazy cat lady. You're no lady. 


But dat are not it. I also wrote resolushuns for da DAWG.

1. Cut it out wif da slobber. It are gross. We know how to clean ourselves, and don't need your spittle interfering.
2. Stop barkin at us. Ya is loud and annoying. Unlike me when I meow for breakfast five minutes after getting breakfast.
3. No more chasing us. Yeah, I'll rub on ya and den run away. I's a cat. I's entitled to change my mind.
4. You are MY dog. Dat are why I rub on you. Not cuz I like you or anything. Stop thinkin I does.
5. SHARE the food. Not my food - YOUR food.
6. I wuz here furst, so no hoggin da momma. 
7. Stop tellin everyone we is friends. Keep it on da D/L.
8. Learn how to groom yourself - you're a mess and momma has to spend way too much time taking care of ya.
9. Learn to sleep at momma's feet, not next to her. Ya don't deserve da primo real estate.    


Happy Mew Year! Bet momma and da DAWG starts breakin da resolushuns tomorrow.

22 comments:

  1. Oh mee Cat yore post iss so funny Travis!!! Yore list fore yore Mumma iss purriceless!!!
    An you ARE furry fashionabill too.
    Angelique an Crockett an Traviss an Mumma have a wunderfull Mew Yeer'ss!***Purrsss*** bellaDharma an ((hugs)) LadyMew

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  2. Both are excellent lists, truly. We hope the momma and the dawg keep them but...

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  3. Wishing you a bacon filled New Year!

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  4. Now those are some great resolutions! BOL!
    xoxo,
    Arty, Jakey & Rosy

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  5. Those are all great resolutions.

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  6. I love your resolutions! They are spot-on!

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  7. Those are great...I need to let Dalton and Benji know about most of those..I still have not decided to rub on either one of them...but I will try to whap them after I sniff them, MOL!

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  8. Good luck - humans are not very cooperative when it comes to following rules WE suggest for them. Maybe you'll have better luck though??? HAPPY NEW YEAR!

    Hugs, Teddy

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  9. Those are very good resolutions for your momma and the dawg. I think you will need a stern paw to make sure they stick to them though.

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  10. I forgot, and a Happy New Year to all of you!

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  11. Those are great resolutions ! We wish you health and happiness for 2019 ! Happy New Year ! Purrs

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  12. Happy New Year,Just to let you know you won my Christmas and Holiday countdown can you Email mummy your address,xx Speedy

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  13. Your New Year's collars are the best!
    I bet you were the belles of the balls!
    The end of every year marks a new year. We wish your next year to be filled with wonderful promises. Wishing you all the best for the upcoming year!
    Purrs
    Marv & Mom

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  14. We hope you have a wonderful New Year - full with love, peace, and happiness.

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  15. @Sherri-Ellen T-D. - Fanks!
    @Melissa, Mudpie and Angel Truffles (Mochas, Mysteries and Meows) - Well, she ackshually kept da bacon one today!
    @The Whiskeratti - Da dawg are already messing up BIG TIME!
    @Just Ducky - Fanks!
    @The Island Cats - So far, so good!
    @Gidget BlueSky - Right back atcha!
    @The Gang at LLB - And momma kept da bacon one!
    @pilch92 15andmeowing - Fanks!
    @Summer - Now if I can just convince momma to follow through . . .
    @Meezer's Mews & Terrieristical Woofs - Momma says we need smack her more.
    @Pam and Teddy - Well, dey kept da bacon one!
    @Memories of Eric and Flynn - Definitely. And Happy Mew Year to you!
    @The Swiss Cats - Happy Mew Year!
    @speedyrabbit - Fanks Speedy!
    @Marv Marvelous - Fank you!
    @Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat - Happy Mew Year!

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  16. Those are some pretty stern resolutions. I'm sure my kitty cat cousins would agree them all, though.

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  17. @C.L.W.STEP - Ya gotta be stern wif my momma and dat DAWG.

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  18. MOL We so luv the dog rules. We don't have a doggy and they sure sound like a lot of trouble. MOL big hugs

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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  19. @Deziz World - Dey are, but I kinda like em. Shhhh.

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Meow! Leave me a comment, I luvs to read dem. Not as much as I luv bacon, but I do luvs em.